So can you guess what it is? TOUCH!! We all need physical touch in our relationships.
Most of the time touch is lumped into a category of various needs we have in our relationships; however this is a little misleading.
This sort of suggests that touch is not any more important than, let’s say, receiving a gift or compliment.
Now don’t misunderstand me…. people have different preferences of needs and may ultimately desire to hear words of support and validity more than being touched; however touch is a need that is absolutely critical to committed relationships because it is a higher-order need.
What does this even mean?
It means that the effects go beyond just emotional, that barring any physical incapacities, it is absolutely essential to having a happy, healthy and loving committed relationship.
The thing is, touch produces physiological arousal and effects.
We’re wired to be touched from the moment we’re born.
If you’ve had a child, you’ve likely heard of skin-to-skin contact and the various benefits of immediate touch between baby and mom (i.e. improvement of body temp, transfer of good bacteria, heart and lung function improvement, less crying, etc.).
When partners have sex, powerful hormones are released…Primarily oxytocin for women and vasopressin for men. Both of these hormones enhance feelings of love, connection, bondedness, and closeness.
Next time you’re thinking about ways to take care of your partner, don’t forget to consider the powerful role of touch in your relationship.